Why you should learn to relax in pregnancy

Relaxation is so important to support you and your baby.

We're not usually taught to relax, for some of us it's fairly easy to stop and chill out. For others it's really hard. Pregnancy may also bring additional challenges of physical discomforts and new worries as you navigate your pregnancy, labour and birth. Relaxation can be a challenge.

When we relax we support our parasympathetic nervous system, the side of our nervous system that dials down stress, anxiety and busy-ness. When we release tensions through the body we immediately feel better and this also helps to signal the mind to become more relaxed as well. When we relax, our heart rate slows and our breathing becomes more easeful.

Your baby feels everything that happens in your body. Tension and tightness, release and relaxation. A calm and relaxed body signals to your baby that all is well, they are safe and secure.

Ways to relax

1. A calm activity that you enjoy - a walk in nature, a relaxing TV or radio programme, listening to your favourite music.

2. Touch - a cuddle or hug with a loved one or a wonderful pregnancy massage.

3. Get into water - a warm bath, gentle shower, gentle swimming.

4. Get still - use lots of cushions and blankets to create a nest so that you can rest comfortably either lying down (on your left side especially from 30 weeks) or sitting (try to have hips higher than knees as you sit to aid optimal positioning for your baby).

5. Listen to a relaxation, yoga nidra, hypnobirthing relaxation, sounds of nature or a meditation - let your mind have something to follow.

6. Laugh - watch a comedy show, laugh with friends.

7. Breathe - listen to or practice breathing exercises for pregnancy or practice your yoga breaths or hypnobirthing techniques.

8. Soften - check in with the following areas of the body and try to gently soften the muscles and skin around them: eyes, jaw, shoulders, tummy, hands.

All of these will help to release tensions, re-balance your nervous system, get the all import oxytocin hormone flowing and give your mind a rest.

A rested mum-to-be equals a baby who knows when they are surrounded by relaxation, you are already teaching them what it feels like to relax and rest before they are born.

When to relax

Whenever you can! Even just 1 minute of relaxation can help reset your nervous system. 10 minutes is great and 15 minutes or more will help your body to physically relax and really let go.

Maybe you can find a few 1 minute breaks in the day to breath, soften or have a cuddle.
Maybe you put aside 10 minutes before you go to bed or when you wake up to listen to a meditation or relaxation, or practice some breathing techniques.

Maybe you can find, half an hour a couple of times a week to relax deeply, listen to music in your rest nest, go for a gentle walk, have a bath or watch some comedy.

An hour a week offers more time for any of the above, a pregnancy yoga class, a massage or a swim.

Mix it up or make it part of your routine, whatever works for you.

Make it easy, a time of day when you have time, or there's a moment between tasks. A day every week where you diary a relaxation date with your self. Set the tone and environment - pick a warmer day to walk; light candles or use pregnancy safe aromatherapy for guided relaxations or a bath; use plenty of cushions to create a comfy nest to listen to a guided yoga nidra, relaxation or meditation; set a date with friends or loved ones to spend time together.

Relaxation in Labour and through Birth

Relaxation is really important during labour. The more we worry, tense up and let pain overwhelm us the more challenging labour becomes (and possibly lasts longer).

When your labour begins REST! Create your rest nest, lying on your left side and try to doze or sleep, or watch TV or listen to music if it’s hard to sleep. Rest will enable your body to charge for when the hard work begins. When you can't rest any more then you need to move.

Gentle rhythmical movement through labour and birth can also create release of tension during labour - circling and swaying the hips on hands and knees or standing can really help. Lean on the wall, a chair or window ledge or use your birth ball. Active birth classes or pregnancy yoga movements are key to a positive birth experience and you can move even if you are being monitored or induced.

Labour is hard work, but it is not impossible - think of how many people have given birth before you! Help your labour and birth to be a positive experience by learning and practising relaxation during pregnancy - get the relaxation muscle memory working well before labour begins. During labour resting gently in forward leaning positions and encouraging yourself to relax (ask birth partners and midwives to gently encourage you to relax) will help you through and between contractions. Lean into the sensation knowing that each wave brings you closer to meeting your baby, if you fight the discomfort you will prolong it - use relaxation techniques , breathing techniques and loving touch from your partner if that feels good to you, to ease you through.

Remembering to relax your jaw can also be really helpful during birth - it has a direct link to the cervix - so a relaxed jaw will help your cervix to release. Breathing through second stage rather than pushing through is also a gentle and more relaxed approach. Use the breath to help release your baby rather than the tightening and tension of pushing, ask your midwife to guide you in this when the time comes.

If you are having a caesarean birth relaxation is really useful to keep you calm and your body at ease as you wait and during the birth. Here's how one pregnancy breathing technique 'Golden Thread Breath' helped one of my ladies:

"It was actually a difficult c section, baby's oblique position and adhesions from previous operations made it tough. My partner reminded me to use the golden thread breathing throughout. Amazingly, my partner watched all of my statistics on a monitor, they were concerned about my heart rate being too low at times, yet when we did the breathing it really improved each time. I'm really pleased I had this technique to help me keep calm and balanced." - Nicola

However, and wherever you labour and birth your baby you can bring a sense of ease, release and relaxation to the process. But remember, if you practice during pregnancy it is much easier to call on during the challenges of labour and birth. You will have set your self up with good skills to help you through - why not start now using the links below!

Affirmations you might like to use:

'I am rested'

'I am relaxed'

'I am calm'

'I relax and allow my body to soften and expand to birth my baby'

'I breathe baby out'

'My body is free of tension and fear and births my baby with ease'

'I breathe in calm and breathe out tension'

'I relax my jaw, I quieten my mind, my body will open and my baby will descend'

'All I have to do is breathe'

Links

Find pregnancy relaxation, meditations and yoga nidras on my pregnancy resources page click here